This article was taken from an email my friend sent me.
Enjoy :)
The choice of a marriage partner should not be based on "I get a warm,wonderful feeling whenever we're together and I want to have that warmwonderful feeling forever, so let's go get married". Feelings, as we have discussed, have no logic on their own.
They need to be acknowledged, ofcourse, but they need considerable assistance from your brain. Marriage means choosing the person you will spend the rest of your life with.This person will live with you, eat meals with you, sleep with you, and go on vacation with you. More important yet, this person will share your children. You need to choose wisely.
The decision should not be made based on feelings alone. You need to ask yourself some tough questions. The decisions have to be made on solid considerations. Will this person be a good partner? Is she/he mature enough to put her/his ownselfish desires aside to look out for what is best for the family? Is heprepared to be a good provider? What is his track record? Is heresponsible enough to get a good job and keep it? Will this person be a good parent? Can you stand the thought of yourchildren turning out exactly like this person? They will, you know.
Children spend a lot of time with their parents and consequently pick up many ormost of their parents' character traits. You had better like your spouse'straits a lot because you will be seeing them again in your children. If something were to happen to you, would you completely trust thisperson, alone, with the ask of raising and forming your children? This is not apleasant thought, but it is an important consideration. Not everyone dies ata ripe old age with great grandchildren gathered around the bed.
Sometimes a parent dies and leaves young children! In the care of the other parent. If you feel that you would need to be around to correct or lessen this person'sinfluence on your children, Then you are considering the wrong person. Does this person share your faith in God? God does not give us children sothat we can mold them into the coolest, most popular people in school.
Our job is to get them to heaven. To do that, we need to raise them believingin God. It is tough to do that if only one parent believes. Saying "this is right and this is wrong, and I want you to ignore Mommyuntil you are thirty-five" does not work. Small children ask about eightskillion questions in a single day.
The answers to those questions go alongway toward forming the kind of adults they will become. Who will be answering those? Questions for your children? Does this person you are marrying have sexual self-control? Single peoplesometimes have this idea that marriage is just some kind of lifelong sexfestival and that as long as they have each other, they will never betempted by other people. Wrong! There are many times in every marriagewhen one partner or the other is sexually unavailable - illness, the lastmonths of pregnancy, travel. There are also times when spouses, just get on eachothers' nerves. At times like this, other people can seem very appealing. That can bedangerous, because there are plenty of very attractive people out therewho are willing to make them available to married men and women. Do you wantsomeone who has never said "no" to sex? If he is not good at saying "no"at eighteen, it won't be different at forty. Do you want to worry aboutwhether or not your spouse is being faithful?
These are very important questions, and if you are not comfortable withall of the answers, you should definitely not marry this person. None if this is to say that feelings play no role at all in a marriage decision.
You don't have to, "Well, I suppose that you would make a goodspouse and parent, so even though I don't particularly like you I guessI'll marry you'. You need to be happy and excited about the prospect ofspending your life with someone. Your brain however, must acknowledge that thisperson as a good catch.
Don't listen to your heart alone or your head alone. Wait until yourheart and head agree.
really nice.. :)
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